won’t drink lukewarm water but i’ll put another person’s genitals in my mouth
Homosexuality is unnatural! It says so in this book where snakes talk, people come back from the dead, a guy walks on water, and a virgin has a baby.
blackboard is the worst invention of all time because there’s literally no way to escape your homework. sick with the flu? homework’s on blackboard. snow day? homework’s on blackboard. house burned down? use your fucking phone because the fucking homework’s on blackboard
when rape is the girls fault
- when she is the rapist
when rape is the guys fault
- when he is the rapist
and, if you can’t get toasted pearl Couscous handpicked and blessed by a Moroccan shaman on the first tuesday of the winter harvest for your Sautéed Escarole then store bought is fine
when youre walking past a dead body in a horror game and it suddenly comes back to life
Oh my god you can almost hear the pug’s screams.
when you go to a friends house and their pet sits next you